A lasting marriage involves communication, love and respect. It takes work, and while many couples suffer the heartache of divorce, there are often ways in which discrepancies and arguments can be resolved in the right manner to prevent this. When you want to fight for your marriage or improve it, here are 9 changes that you should make:
1. Be Open With One Another
Talk to each other and discuss problems and issues that you’re facing. You remember those vows of “for better or for worse?” This is the “for worse” part. Bottling issues up is only going to lead to resentment and annoyance. There’s the risk of distrust in a relationship.
2. Listen to Each Other
Start listening—really listening—to what each other has to say. Acknowledge your partner’s feelings, and take steps to help make things better. Don’t just go along with what you think your partner wants, but ask, listen and be receptive to the truth.
3. Take Up a Hobby Together
This will need to be something you both love, but there’s surely something you can both find to do together. Taking up a mutual hobby is a great way to learn more about the other person and find a new connection. It could be something like a love of board games or being fans of nature.
4. Put Down the Phone
Smartphones are taking over our lives. It could be Facebooking friends and relatives, or catching that latest Pokemon. Either way, your smartphone use will affect your marriage. You’re not able to pay full attention to each other, and it can lead to a lack of communication. Set time in the day for both of you to stop using the phone and talk more.
5. Sleep at the Same Time
Okay, maybe sleeping at the same time is difficult, but you should at least go to bed at the same time. Either of you can read if you can’t sleep, or wait for the other to drift off. The benefit of going to bed at the same time is that you can have discussions and the alone time that marriages need to be nurtured.
6. Surprise Your Partner
Do something that is a pleasant surprise. It doesn’t mean buying something expensive; just a small bouquet of flowers or breakfast in bed shows that you care.
7. Think About Your Memories Together
Spend some time looking over your photos from your past. They could be from when you met, your wedding day, or a family holiday. Treasure the memories and find a way to build them into your future.
8. Get Out of the Routine
It’s so easy to fall into routines, especially during the working week. You have a schedule that you need to stick to, and you can end up scheduling your relationship into that. It’s time to be more spontaneous with your family. Stop thinking about the negatives and focus on how much your marriage will grow.
9. Take a Relationship Therapy Retreat
Getting away together is a great way to strengthen your marriage. Make one of your changes to get away together—just the two of you. A relationship therapy retreat will give you the chance to discuss any issues you’ve had, talk to other couples about their hints and tips, and explore new parts of your partner you never knew existed.
Now is the time to make the changes. Don’t leave it until your marriage is completely on the rocks or close to its end. Take preventative steps by making the positives changes above to improve your marriage.